'but whoever denies me before men, I also will
deny before my Father who is in heaven.
Matthew 10:33
When people are sick they will say most anything if it means getting well, and if I should happen to ‘cure’ them of their affliction, they often heap ‘praise’ upon me that makes me feel at the very least uncomfortable.
They will say things like, ‘you walk on water’ or you’re a miracle worker. Most times when this happens I am caught off guard and I struggle for something polite to say. I have said things like ‘no, last I checked only two people were able to do that and I wasn’t one of them’, or ‘I'm not the one who works the miracles’.
I often pray that the Holy Spirit will inspire me and give me the correct words to say but it doesn’t always seem that my words are said with conviction.
The odd thing about this type of encounter, is that when these patients say these things, they seem visibly upset when I deflect their ‘words of gratitude’. I sort of understand this because I may appear to them as ungrateful. But while I am truly appreciative of their recognition of what I had done for them, I just can’t accept what they are saying as a ‘gospel truth’!
Perhaps they say these things because they are so overcome with emotion they don’t know what to say. But in part it may be because their faith is not strong enough to acknowledge where the true source of healing comes from. The irony, of course, is that many years ago I would have completely agreed with them.
Human emotion being what it is, we like to be complemented on our accomplishments, particularly when it involves saving someone’s life. But I am always mindful of the fact that I am able to do what I do because I have been blessed by God with intelligence, talent and a 'sixth sense'.
On the other hand, there are other patients that have said to me, ‘I thank God for putting you in my life to help me’, and those times I am in complete agreement.
Recently however, I took care of a woman who said something that really startled me.
Theresa Purvis had been diagnosed with and treated for breast and lung cancer, and surprisingly had done well. That is until she developed a headache and became somewhat confused. An MRI of her brain did not reveal a metastatic tumor, per se, but evidence that the tumor may have spread somewhat surreptitiously to cerebrospinal pathway around the brain.
I was asked by her oncologist to perform a simple procedure, a spinal tap, to obtain some fluid which would be analyzed to see if in fact the cancer had spread to the brain.
To be sure that Theresa would be as comfortable as possible and that I wouldn’t encounter any difficulty with the procedure, I arranged to have it done in the operating room instead of at her bedside on the regular ward. This way she could be easily sedated and I would have available all the supplies I might need.
Everything went very smoothly, and I was done in less than 15 minutes. Of course Theresa had been lightly sedated but when I stood up and leaned over her to tell her I was done, she had a surprised look on her face. Amazed, she said, ‘you’re kidding, right?’ I said, ‘no, I’m done’. She then said boldly, ‘you are God’!
‘No’, I replied. ‘I’m just here to give Him a hand’.
Perhaps it was the medication she received or maybe it was the cancer that had infiltrated her brain, but she appeared to dismiss my remark and turned back to lie down on the stretcher.
Nonetheless, afterwards I felt deeply grateful that for the first time I was able to say the right thing at the right time, regardless of whether the patient was inspired by my remark or not. After all there were others nearby, nurses, doctors and perhaps a patient or two that may have overheard what I said.
In the end we never may know the full impact of what we say or do on the lives of others. All we can really do is try to be the best version of ourselves and have faith that others follow our example.
Hal I have really enjoyed some of your blog's and this is no exception. It is difficult to respond to a remark like that by someone without knowing a lot about them. I would say to you that you do some miraculous things, but the fact that a person with tremendous needs is put together with you and your tremendous skills at just the right time to save thier life is THE miracle. You like your scalpel are a tool of the miracle maker in my humble opinion. Look forward to meeting you. Brian
Posted by: Brian McCutcheon | 07/04/2011 at 10:03 AM