Jesus said to him, “Rise, take up your pallet and walk.”
And at once the man was healed, and
he took up his pallet and walked.
Afterward Jesus found him in the temple, and said to him,
“See you are well! Sin no more, that nothing worse befall you.”
John 5:8-9, 14
In my last post I included a passage from Luke’s gospel that told the story about Jesus giving sight to a blind man. The key statement by Jesus was: “Receive your sight; your faith has made you well”. Here, Jesus heals a paralytic but the implication, to me, is not just that the man was able to physically walk, which certainly was a miracle, but that he should also walk in the footsteps of Jesus. And just to be sure the man ‘got it’; Jesus finds him later and clarifies what is really important in his new life by saying, “Sin no more, that nothing worse befall you”.
Recently, my wife’s mother Janice, who had been ill, past way. Because we had been on Cape Cod at the time we had a funeral service there. She was then cremated and when we returned to Florida we had a funeral mass here.
At both services I was asked to deliver a eulogy celebrating her life and the person she was. In contemplating what this was, I kept being reminded that the single most important characteristic of her life was the love she had for her children and later in life, her grandchildren.
A passage from John’s gospel clearly spoke of this to me; It was when Jesus gives his apostles a new commandment that they love one another as He loved them. He then tells them, “by this all men will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another”.
And this is what Janice tried to become in her life… a true disciple of Jesus Christ.
After we got home to Florida, my wife, Stacy found a journal that her mother had kept. In one particular entry from several years ago, she spoke over and over about walking with Jesus. And how she regretted earlier in life not ‘seeing’ that this is what she should have been doing all along. Yet, she was grateful for finally realizing that this was the path she should be on.
I guess I knew she was close to God; after all He used her to touch and change my heart many years ago when cynicism and selfishness threatened to derail me off my path to help others using the gift God gave me.
But, and I am embarrassed to say so, because she wouldn’t come to church with us on Sunday I merely assumed God was not playing a big role in her life. It is ironic that in our efforts to be ‘good Christians’ we allow the evil one to cause us to be judgmental of others when they do not ‘appear’ to be the same ‘God-fearing’ people we perceive ourselves to be.
Of course she had very real health reasons that kept her homebound but I felt she should have made a better effort to be there. Jesus, I suspect would have been more loving and understanding than I. As it turned out she was walking closer to Christ than I was…
When she was 16, she had a vision while she was hospitalized. She recalled that God appeared to her surrounded by the brightest of lights with a child at His feet. She then heard Him say ‘Do not fear, I am here’. At the time it seemed to me she was more confused rather than inspired by what she had ‘seen’.
Later in life as she looked back on this experience, she regretted not allowing it to influence her decisions in life more. I guess we all have our demons that constantly struggle with the good inside of us. Jan worried a lot and as a result became very anxious. Often she found herself being critical and judging others which led to what she called ‘tears of frustration’.
She realized that often she was not always able to forgive others for what they may have done to her. Quite eloquently she wrote that because of this particular failing she had deprived herself of the gift of God’s love and forgiveness.
The one thing that Jan did excel at all her life though, was her love for all her ‘children’. Very much like Jesus, Jan did cherish the innocence and hope that is embodied in every child.
And calling to him a child, he put him in the midst of them
and said, “Truly I say to you, unless you turn and become
like children, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven.
Whoever humbles himself like this child, he is the greatest
in the kingdom of heaven.”
Matthew 18:2-3
Later in life though, through much prayer Jan reached out to God in the ‘truest form’ and as result came to truly know Him and as a result was able to not only walk in the footsteps of Christ but ‘with’ Him. Of course she realized her first steps had to begin with forgiveness and in this she found such peace and love.
About 10 years ago, Jan’s husband Don or as he was called by his grandchildren, ‘Pa’ was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Throughout this time, Jan devoted every waking moment to him right up until his last day three years ago. She missed him dearly but she continued her journey with Christ. Not that it was always easy…
Two years ago she was diagnosed with lung cancer. Initially it was thought because the tumor was so small it could be successfully treated and perhaps cured with a specialized form of radiation. And for a while she did well and continued to live her life to the fullest traveling to Cape Cod with Stacy and with our family to the cabin in North Carolina.
But earlier this year the cancer recurred and so we all were forced to face the reality that she would die, although the end came more quickly than we had anticipated.
As the summer approached she had wanted to make one more trip back to her home on Cape Cod. A repeat PET scan showed the cancer still had not spread so we felt she would be able to make the trip and we fully expected her to make it back to Florida before the end would come.
In fact she was so happy and gleeful to be heading back to Cape Cod that she seemed to have new-found strength that overcame the weakness of her illness. And as she crossed the Sagamore Bridge she had a sparkle in her eye and a smile ‘ear to ear’.
Sadly, as soon as she got home, she weakened quickly and practically before we could realize what had happened, she passed away on the 4th of July with her family and friends surrounding her, as a final tear rolled down her cheek.
Watching and helping my wife take care of her in the last several months, as she became more and more dependent on Stacy for her care, it seemed as though she became more and more like the child that Christ wanted her to become that day in the hospital 60 years earlier.
Just this past week, Stacy lay to rest the ashes of Jan (or Mimi as the grandchildren called her) and Pa at home in Sandwich, Massachusetts. Together again, they are surrounded by the love of her Lord, Jesus Christ.
‘When a woman is in labor she has pain, because her hour has come;
but when she is delivered of the child, she no longer remembers
the anguish, for joy that a child is born into the world. So you
have sorrow now, but I will see you again and your hearts will rejoice,
and no one will take your joy from you.’
John 16:21-22
